I am not Bill Cosby.

So, due to my newfound obsession with vintage sewing patterns, I have a few saved eBay searches.  Including one for "Mondrian sewing patterns", in the hopes that it'll turn up something along the lines of this famous dress:

So, obviously, I was all atwitter when I opened my email and saw that I had a hit.

My excitement didn't last long.

BEHOLD THE HORROR:

 

And I don't like how it's waving at me.   It's creepy.